|
freedom_song
|
read my profile
sign my guestbook
Name: Emily
Country: United States
State: California
Metro: Ventura
Birthday: 3/2/1986
Gender: Female
Interests: Reading, anything to do with music, old cars, monkeys, rocks, socks, foriegn cultures/languages, ....
Expertise: Singing, writing, kicking your grandmomma's booty
Message: message me
Member Since:
8/4/2004
|
|
| I know it's been a long time, xanga. Life hasn't been much to update about.
Today I ask that anyone who reads this, I don't care who you are, to please keep my whole family in your prayers.
Last night my cousin passed away. He was like a brother to me. He was only 21. We're still waiting for the toxicology report, but they know it wasn't natural causes. There is another young man (18) who died in the next town over (T.O.) the night before my cousin died who had the same situation. The boy had a party at his house. It's most likely my cousin was there and they got some bad drugs.
Pray for us...pray for the other boy's family, too.
I can safely say that this is the worst thing I've ever been through.
| | |
| So here I am... sitting in my "room" that feels more like a room (as of today) at home.
I realize that I haven't written a blog since before I came home... well here you go.
A few Sundays ago I decided to not return to Simpson next semester. I spent the next few days running around getting signatures, telling people I was leaving, and having them beg me not to leave. Dayna, Brittany, and the lovely assorted others threw me a good-bye party, with squirrel sock puppets, story time, and everything. I packed my shit in a few hours on that Friday. Mom and Mike got there around 6 and helped me pack, and then we headed home on Saturday.
I have spent the last 2 weeks doing the holiday thang and getting reacquainted with life as I know it. There have been plenty of times where people ask me about school, and get confused when I give them short, simple answers. There have been plenty of times that I have gotten annoyed by people asking me so many questions. People ask because they don't understand...but what they don't understand is that I don't understand either.
I'm going to have a hell of a time going back to Moorpark. I'm highly overjoyed. Altho I am quite excited to get back into tap class. That'll help.
You don't realize how many thoughts I am avoiding typing. I have avoided thinking too much about this, which is why I haven't updated in a while.
So I'mma end that little thing with... it happened. I'm here. I'm home. Deal with it.
I've spent a lot of time with people since I got back. I haven't had much time to myself, which is fine by me, it's just dangerous. I feel like people very much don't understand. I wish people could just know that it's not them. I don't hate them, and I don't mean to be rude. I don't think they will ever understand that tho, cuz I don't know how to explain that. Which is why I'm glad I have Kyle, who has a knack for not asking questions... he just helps make it feel better. He gets a lot of shit for doing so, but I'm grateful he's willing to even try.
This post probably doesn't make much sense to you blog people. I'm sorry if it doesn't, I've had a lot of sugar and my head hurts. If it does make sense, you get a cookie.
It's all over the place, I know.
I'm done tho cuz I'm bored of typing and I'm tired.
Goodnight I love you!
| | |
| Being here has caused me to realize that I'm a very intriguing person, and incredibly entertaining. I apparently make people's day really funny. People are very sad that I'm leaving, genuinely, too. Not that fake "oh we'll miss you" kind of thing. I was telling 2 girls about my squirrelly party that Dayna and Brittany are throwing me, and Daniel, a guy I only know a little bit stopped me in the middle of my sentence and said "You're LEAVING??? Where are you going? But we'll miss you!" and I could tell he really meant it. He's not a very fluffy fellow, he has no reason to be fake with me. Danielle said I have made her life better being here... since I taught her how to shake what her mama spent 9 months cooking...
I'mma miss her "Hello Beautiful!"s every day. I'mma miss mornings with Nita, sitting in the Caf eating breakfast and making bitter, sarcastic comments about everything. I will definitely miss antics with Cindy quoting Monty Python and singing the wrong lyrics to songs loud and off key... and using music terms in everyday speech to confuse those around us... and the hugs and walking arm in arm telling retarded stories about "this one time...". I'mma miss The Slate... staying up really late and talking to the computer and bantering back and forth with Liz with Sarah in between wondering what on earth we're on about. And Andrew making cat/cow/pirate/hick/frog/whatever noises from the other room. And Liz playing that horrid "Look Into The Eyeball" song just to make me curl in the fetal position and cry. And having Liz, Sarah, and Candice not know I'm on the phone and think I'm crazy at first and then start making conversation with my mommy or Kyle (who are the only ones who call me during production). I'm most certainly going to miss the music department... with Dr. Pinkston's projectiles and obsession with The Beatles and Radiohead... and making jokes in theory that only I get. Dr. Pereira's artwork will be greatly missed... and his famous "there is a lot of talent/potential here" and his sarcastic humour, and learning new english slang words like "cool" and "wicked" and then using them in a sentence with his thick accent. Dr. Corbin and his way-too-chipper morning attitude and walking by while I'm trying to concentrate on theory homework and confuzzing me with things related to what I'm doing but not exactly what I'm doing. I'll miss Mrs. Nichols' ability to play along with our jokes but have no idea what exactly we're talking about... and her amazing sight-reading skillz. Shelly the Music Mom will be greatly missed... as she is always very funny and helps us pull all our pranks on the music profs anytime we ask her... and her ability to know where Dr. Pinkston is at any given time. I will most certainly miss Jan and her cute smile and bubbly personality...makes voice fun. I will miss Leave Dayna A Message Time with Brittany after chorale... coming with new ways to entertain Dayna on her way to meet us for dinner... and Dr. Pereira's face when he walks in the lobby in the middle of it and laughing and saying "well that was...interesting!". I will miss singing and dancing with Brittany and happy-fun random pictures. I will dearly miss "ROOMMATE!" with Dayna and talking about the most random things... and listening to her sleep... like right now she's making cute noises. I'll miss Kelsey's impersonations and how we can make up the most bizarre, yet believable stories to try to make each other crack, and grossing out Dayna and ruining her romanticism by talking about how granny panties and dirty socks are our ideal wedding-night apparel. I'll miss Bree and Dayna yelling "we love you Kyle!" at random times while I'm on the phone with him. I'll miss Bree and Liz.... and their boys.... and laughing at their boys' comments and then them blushing and hoping I won't tell the girls what they meant when they realize I understood what they meant... and me giving them all boy/girl advice... and being adopted into their family, and our blatant love for Pirates and Little Mermaid, and hugz with Liz... and our inside jokes about jiggly butts and other assorted phrases. I'll miss the infamous "so...what's the meaning of life?" question asked in the bathroom whenever someone is brushing their teeth. And the battle of the light switch and Dayna fearing my revenge someday. I will miss Bill's high fives and "emileh!"s across campus. I will miss CJ making up sign language in chorale and Reanna's daily attempts to have me laugh so hard I can't sing....Ride on, Jesus, ride! (laughing just thinking about it). I'll miss John the Maintenance Guy who calls me the "lovely young lady" and says hi to me every time I see him. I'll the geese and their strategic placement on the grass so they look like really lost Lawn Flamingos. I won't miss the food, but I'll miss all the caf workers and asking them to list all the ingredients in the food and testing their colour knowledge by saying "I'll take some of everything that's green"... or whatever colour may suit my fancy that meal. I will also miss watching people FREAK out when there are no bagels... it's a sight to see, really.
So what I'm trying to say here is that I'll miss this place... I'll miss the people and the love. I don't regret coming here. It has taught me a lot... about people, life, music, religion, and myself.
Don't think I don't like it here... I do. I love it. But there is a time and a place for everything... and right now my place is home.
I feel like I'm 10 again...
goodnight
| | |
| This is me...writing a blog... I know you kids over in xanga-land haven't had a blog in a while.
Last week was Hell Week. Starting last weekend, I had 7 performances between hand-bells and chorale, 1 studio performance, 5 extended chorale sessions, 3 major rehearsals for hand-bells and chorale, and 2 concerts to attend. That's...a LOT of music. It was fun, and worth it... but it was muy tiring. Oh and on top of all that it was production week for the last newspaper of the semester. Which wasn't bad at all cuz it was only 6 pages instead of 8... less work for me!
Yesterday (Sunday) was our chorale concert which went quite nicely...which ended Hell Week...and thus began Finals Week.
I don't have too much to do for finals, and yet I have so much to do. I made a schedule of this week, and at the bottom wrote a list of "Things I need to do this week". It was a very profound moment... the action of actually writing it down just kinda sealed the deal. Like writing your name in blood. Feels weird....
Anyway... Tonight Liz, Sarah, and I were going to vandalize... ended up not working out tho cuz the guy helping us get in the office didn't have a key to the Development office. It was incredibly funny though to watch them freaaaaaak out at every little noise. They were scared out of their minds. It was hilarious. I was completely calm. I mean, really... what are Campus Safety or whoever going to do to us if we get caught? Pray for us and cast out our demons? Give us a level? Not nearly as frightening as like, let's say...getting arrested or shot. So I had a lot of fun watching them get scared by everything. It was their idea too, which makes it even funnier. I didn't have to convince the good girls to do something *gasp* bad! They wanted to do it all on their own accord. I'm so amused.... So hopefully we'll get to vandalize later this week.
Last week I pulled out my "christmas lights" and was going to put them up before heading to dinner... but they attacked me and I had to wrestle them... well I got frustrated and threw them on my head, which gave Brittany an idea. So she went to her room, grabbed her camera and we took a few pictures.... I thought they'd make super amazing christmas pictures, and oh my yes they did!
So this years Nerdy Christmas Picture-card from Emily is brought to you by the battle of the Christmas Lights. Let me just say, Christmas Lights 1 - Emily 9. Nailed those suckers to the wall and got funny pictures out of it! Yeah....who's tough now???
 | | |
| Pray for me.
I'm confused and conflicted...and oh so tired.
I need....strength mostly....encouragement and wisdom would be nice too....
This is not easy....
| | |
|
